Sunday, April 22, 2012

Contest - Minion Games

It's been a long time since I ran a contest. This is primarily because I don't really have anything to give away, but it's also because I hate dealing with postage. It's a pain in the ass, really, and it's easier if I just blow it off and wait for free games to show up so I can write about them instead of actually buying them like normal people.

But last night, I got an offer that I just couldn't refuse. Well, I suppose I could refuse it. All I had to do was go, 'I have decided to refuse your offer.' So I guess it's more accurate to say I decided not to refuse it. So whatever, couldn't or wouldn't, it amounts to the same thing - someone is getting free stuff. You can be just like me, getting free stuff, except that you don't have to feel obligated to write about it and add some dirty jokes to go for the cheap laugh.

The contest is sponsored by Minion Games (as you may have guessed, had you read the title of this post and saw that it said, 'Contest - Minion Games,' though I suppose you may have been confused and just thought it was a game about creepy little bastards who work for mad scientists or something). They're running a contest, too, where they'll give away a game every week and then someone will get something for free, just like me but without the stupid gags.

If you want to enter the contest at Drake's Flames, all you have to do is write me an email and tell me which Minion Games game you want to win. Then I'll go through the list, throw out anyone I don't know, and just make one of my friends the winner. Then Minion Games will send a free game to someone I know, and everyone else will think they entered a fair contest run by a totally impartial third party.

Ha! No, I won't really do that. I'm not paying for shipping, so I don't care who gets this free game. There are some fun games in there, and honestly, I'm just going to pick one random person and send the name to Minion, who will send hunchbacks to your house to rub their hands and say, 'yes master!' in a most obsequious fashion. That, or they will send you a free game.

So I'm basically telling you about two contests. For the Drake's Flames contest, do these things:
1. Go to and look at their games. They have some fun ones.
2. Pick one of these games as the one you want to win:
    Five-Fingered Severance
    Grave Business
    Those Pesky Humans
    NILE deLuxor
    Sturgeon (don't pick this one, it's not very much fun)
3. Email me at and tell me your name, your address, and what game you want.
4. Wait a week, and then I'll pick a winner and send the name to Minion, who will ship you a free game (if you won - for most people, step 4 will not really be necessary).

For the Minion Games contest, where they're giving away a game a week, you have to buy something. It's cool, though - the contest is actually at, and they have a TON of stuff. Like crazy dice, RPG books, board games, and other stuff that's especially cool if you're a nerd. Here's how you enter that one:
1. Go to
2. Buy something. I don't care what. Neither do they, but they would rather you spent a lot of money.
3. When you get to the last step of the checkout sequence, there's a little notes box for special order instructions and what-not. Just put 'Drake's Flames' in there, and you'll be entered to win a free game.

So there you have it, two contests for free games. For the first one, all you have to do is email me. For the second one, you have to buy stuff, which I know you do anyway. For the Drake's Flames contest, I'll announce the winner next Monday, April 30, and then that lucky bastard can have a free game. For the RPGShop contest, I won't have any idea who won, so I won't be announcing that.

OK, go.


MrBaconpants said...

Did some one win? I didn't see an update to the post.


DK said...

I won! I had forgotten I even answered and got my game Friday. Those Pesky Humans are going to get a stomping soon.